Drama Triangle
The Drama Triangle sounds like something you might find in a soap opera, reality TV show, or the family WhatsApp group! In reality, it is a psychological model developed by Stephen Karpman that describes three common roles people can unconsciously move between during conflict, stress, and relationships. The three roles are the Victim, the Rescuer, and the Persecutor. The important thing to understand is that these are not identities. They are roles that most of us step into from time to time. This is about awareness, no judgement and no gold stars for avoiding them.
The Victim often feels powerless, overwhelmed, unheard, or stuck. The Rescuer rushes in to fix, save, advise, or take responsibility for other people’s problems (Hello, older daughter of immigrant parents, we see you). The Persecutor criticises, blames, controls, or points out what everyone else is doing wrong. The fascinating part is that people rarely stay in one role. The exhausted Rescuer who spends years helping everyone else may suddenly become the Victim, feeling unsupported and resentful. The Victim may become the Persecutor after reaching breaking point. Around and around the triangle people go, often without realising it.
At the New School of Nutritional Medicine, we find the Drama Triangle incredibly useful because it helps explain patterns that show up not only in relationships, but also in health. Have you ever felt like a victim of your symptoms? A Rescuer to everyone around you, whilst neglecting yourself? Or perhaps a Persecutor towards your own body when it does not behave as you think it should? The goal is not to label yourself, but to become curious. Awareness is often the first step towards change, because once you can see the pattern, you no longer have to keep repeating it.
